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The Lazy Gun Cult

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Postby David Whyld » Mon Jan 09, 2006 8:53 pm

The Lazy Gun Cult by Felic Roman (a Quest game)


There are times when playing The Lazy Gun Cult that I just felt like screaming. It's not the worst text adventure game I've every played, but it certainly misses out so many things that just about every other game I've ever played includes. Examples? There are doors that cannot be opened because the 'open' command hasn't been implemented. There's a door which I'm informed I can't open because it's locked, but – guess what? – the 'unlock' command hasn't been implemented. There's a button in another room. Now, what do you do when you find a button? You push it. Only not here apparently because the 'push' command hasn't been implemented. Are there are any basic commands Quest understands beyond compass directions and 'get', 'drop' and 'examine'? A few maybe, but good luck on finding them.

Still want to play the game after reading all that? Then read on...

You're a private investigator specialising in paranormal cases. You receive an anonymous call telling you to check out an old mansion where cult rituals are taking place. So, armed with not a single item at all, you set off to investigate it. And promptly find yourself locked in the mansion because, as sheer bad luck would have it, the door closed behind you and now you can't get out. (Probably not the worst introduction I've ever read but not much to write home about. Where's the depth? The setting of the scene? And am I expected to believe that my detective just decided to venture to this mansion in the middle of nowhere because a source told him there were cult rituals being enacted there?)

The Lazy Gun Cult wasn't quite as bad as some of the other Quest games I decided to review for the Non-Comp Review Project 2005, but it had so many things wrong with it that I'd be hard pressed to recommend it to anyone. Aside from the unimplemented commands, there are problems with the way items appeared in the room descriptions. You'll often see things like:

There is a small plinth pillar here.
a cask of oil

Or:

You can enter the venting tube system via a hole in the wall to your north, and an open trapdoor in the floor creates an exit down.
a bottle, a metal feather and A drawer in the desk.

Surely it wouldn't take a lot of effort to produce something better than "a bottle, a metal feather and a drawer in the desk"? I mean, this is a game I'm supposed to play and enjoy and the writer hasn't even bothered fixing the room descriptions so the items in it display properly.

While I didn't discover any hideous game-crashing bugs in The Lazy Gun Cult, I quickly found myself getting peeved off with it on the whole. The sheer amount of commands that should have worked but didn't made getting anywhere a struggle. There were the usual flaws that seem to bog down most Quest games – lack of background, remarkably poor standard of writing, typos, grammatical errors, items that can't be examined even when you're looking right at them – and in the end it wasn't a hard decision to give up playing and try something else instead.

2 out of 10
David Whyld
 
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